I woke up this morning with a start. It’s the first day of school! My Teenager is officially a SENIOR. My oldest Girlie is heading to 1st Grade. Today marks another set of first day moments for my memories. It’s so hard to believe that these two have come this far. I remember holding each of them in my arms so clearly, now seeing them walking out the door this morning was bittersweet. They have grown up so fast. Yet my memories seem set on making time slow down just a bit.
The Teenager is pretty independent at this point so as I was waking up my Girlie and getting her all bathed and dressed in her first skirt/polo shirt combo uniform, he was already showered, dressed and downstairs eating and listening to his music in those ever-present earphones. As we came down the stairs, I looked at him sitting there with his head bopping and couldn’t help but flash back to the day I walked him to Pre-K as he kept asking me if I was sure he had to go. He was only 2 1/2. He had been apart from me before because I had been working and going to school almost since he was born. Yet this was different. He knew it and I knew it. This time he was staying home with Grandma. I wouldn’t be coming to check on him at lunch time and he would be in the comfort of home. He knew he was going to be with strangers. A teacher he met only once and kids he never met before.
As we walked down the pathway to the Pre-K entrance I felt his little hand grip mine just a that much tighter. It was all I could do not to wrap him up in my arms and make a run for it back to the car. What would we be running from? Reality? The reality that I was giving my baby boy to the real world and not getting him back? That from this point on he was going to be in school for the next 12 years at the least? There was no place to run. We had to face this together. Like we did everything and like we always would. So we walked on.
I stopped at the door for a moment and assured him that everything was going to be fine. Grandma was going to be there for him as soon as it was time to go home and Mommy would be home right after work. I told him I wanted to know everything that happened that day at school. I told him not to be scared and to make new friends. This is something I said almost every year of school until he was too old to worry or old enough to know it on his own.
Then today, I stood and watched as my Teenager sat there with no worries of this 1st day. This day was no biggie. It’s SENIOR year and he’s a Pro. He’s done this plenty of times before and there was no need to hold my hand and ask if he has to go. Yet some part of me want to ask because I know that after this year he will be going much farther than our front door. After this year, he will walk to the path of College a life I have hopefully prepared him for. Instead I snapped my first day of school pictures and made my memories because today I saw in front of me the young man he was to become as well as the baby he will always be in my heart.
When I returned and sat with my Girlie as she ate her breakfast, she started telling me how excited she was to go back to school and to meet her new teacher. How she couldn’t wait to talk to her friends from Kindergarten and find out where she was going to sit, what 1st Grade was all about and what her classmates were like. I sat there smiling and thinking how grown she has gotten since last year. I remembered how excited she was then as well.
My Girlie has always been my ‘old soul’ child. The one who seemed a lot older in wisdom and knowledge than her 6 years may give her credit for. So as she went on about how she still remembers her lunch number and what she planned on telling her teacher she did over the summer I knew she was going to be okay. She had no worries about leaving me for the day, how her day would go or making friends. This was my confident little Rockstar and I couldn’t wait to hear the stories she would come home with at the end of the day.
Still as we made our way to the door, backpack all stuffed with supplies and her big girl uniform pressed and tucked, I still gave my pep talk. I told her I wanted to know everything that happened that day at school, not to be scare and to make new friends. Afterall, I saw in her the young woman she too would become but right now, right now I had my baby and she would always be in my heart.
I have two more Kiddies I will have to have these First Day Moments For My Memories to make, how will I handle them? I’m not sure. do I look forward to them? Yes. I know they have to come because without them none of the other major moments will follow. Does it make it easier? Not really. Still I love every second of them.
How did you deal with you Kiddies First Day Moments? Did they spark any memories of moments passed?
“Believe in yourself, your passions, and your dreams. Your voice is unique – build on that. Embrace what is different about you and make it your greatest asset!”
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